We actually got a positive pregnancy result! Elizabeth was working earlier than I, so the pattern was usually the same for these things. She’d get up before me and head to the bathroom (which she would have done normally). I might be awake or partially awake but I was usually aware that testing was nigh. One great thing about the morning, I’m always too tired to worry about anything. So, generally, I might be a little aware that she’d off to the bathroom and a little aware that she’s taking a pregnancy test (which I might had bought at Walgreens the night before if we didn’t have any left over from the last month). Until now the result had always been silence so when I heard her yelp from the bathroom I pretty much knew what was happening. I think I took about a dozen photos of that test.

By the way, there are lots of great net resources about interpreting a pregnancy test. They can be confusing in terms of what to look for and various brands and versions test for different amounts of the pregnancy hormone (HCG). One site I saw was where a woman who’d confirmed her pregnancy went out and bought every brand/version she could find. Knowing she was actually pregnant, she took all the tests to see how they would display the results. Interestingly, some tests seemed definitive where others were inconclusive (a faint line may seem inconclusive but is in fact a positive result). One test even gave a negative result!

So we were pregnant. A second test confirmed it and we called Northwestern to make that first appointment. Unless you want a blood test simply to confirm the pregnancy itself, you will generally wait until the eighth week to see the doctor for the first ultrasound. This was suprising to us but it’s just the way it’s done. What to do next? Nothing. Wait.

About this time we had a dispute with our landlord over renovations she was doing. She’d decided to install central air in our 70 year old 6-flat building in Oak Park. While that seems just great, being on the third floor meant the AC unit (indoor part) would take up all of our hall closet. That left us with three closets remaining in the entire two-bedroom. We might have been able to deal with that, except the entire process was into its fourth week, three longer than we were told. On top of that, workers were entering our apartment every day and all our possessions were continually convered with dust. Concerned about her health, Elizabeth told our landlord that she was pregnant and she wouldn’t tolerate being exposed to whatever cam out of breaking into 70 year-old walls. The landlord’s only concession, she put us in a hotel for a week (and took it off the rent, but did not cover any expense). A footnote: when the thing was finally installed, it sounded like a jet airplane flying overhead — we had to turn up the volume on the T.V. by 25% every time it came on.

One side aspect of telling the landlord was that pretty quickly everyone in the building knew Elizabeth was pregnant. That’s all well and good, but most people wait a while (2nd trimester) to announce their pregnancy due to the risk of miscarriage. We knew this was common practice and weren’t advertising although we also weren’t exactly worried about miscarrying. It’s not that common, right?

While in the hotel, we went whole hog. It was Elizabeth’s birthday on the 23rd, so among her presents were several baby/pregnancy books we had great fun poring through. We even went to the mall and browsed the maternity store to see what lay ahead for Elizabeth’s fashion wardrobe. “Just looking,” of course. Our stay in the hotel was to be about a week.

On about the 24th Elizabeth noticed some spotting. Thankfully with an internet connection and our many books, we were able to find that such is pretty common and could be the result of implantation bleeding. Generally, if the color changes to a more recent shade and there is associated cramping, it’s time to call your doctor. The good and bad of the internet is that you will find every combination of symptoms with every combination of results. In other words, someone else has experienced exactly what you’re experiencing and things have been okay or were not okay. Polling message board posts is inaccurate, too, because people who are having issues are more likely to write/inquire about them. Women who are doing just dandy don’t write to say they’re a-okay. On the flip side, you realize you’re not at all alone in your experience. In our case, the color got redder and the cramps got worse. We called Northwestern and were told to come in the next day.

Its interesting being in a maternity wing of a hospital when you’re going through this experience. You realize you’re mostly surrounded by mothers in various stages of pregnancy (including post-pregnancy) and you walk among them knowing that while you’re filled with dread, they’re in for their monthly visit, happily counting down to their due date as they think of things like cribs, diapers and prenatal yoga. You’re in there hoping that everyone is wrong about your symptoms and you’ll be among the lucky few who get a big scare but turn out okay.

The first thing they wanted was a urine test because, after all, we’d never officially confirmed a pregnancy. Pretty soon after that we learned that while the proper hormone was present, it seemed a bit low. Eventually we went in for the ultrasound and anxiously watched the screen, having no idea what to look for. The tech saw what she sought, however, a tiny — empty — sac. On the screen it looked like a little black teardrop in a sea of gray. She reported that that’s where the baby/fetus/embryo was but it was empty.

While there we met our OB/GYN for the first time, Dr. Clinton. She assured us that she was confident we’d be in again soon and, well… these things happen. One thing you do learn that’s reassuring, is that miscarriages are often the result of some genetic abnormality, that something was wrong with the baby and the mother’s body rejects it. That really is a good thing where nature saves us from even more pain and heartache, and also clears the slate so you can try again.